O photogenic cat, thou art so photogenic.
Thy photogenicness knows no earthy bounds.
Thy picturesque form and photogenicness are sung unto the heavens.
No doubt this was your devious goal, o you
Photogenic cat of time and space unknown
Your powers make us fall to our knees
hail the great photogenic cat
in all her photogenicness
she is ten times the man we will ever be
He said what we have all said at one time or another.
Come, listen to the wisdom he dispels
Unto those ears who know much
“That cat is so photogenic
“I’m just going to sit on a bench and cry about it
“Not because I’m jealous. Not because I overreact to things.
“But because photogenicness is the true measure of truth
“And prosperity and dignity and joy
Howfore art thou tormentor and yet
I cannot look away from you, o beast
Thou devious devil photogenic cat
And why must you destroy the infrastructure
Photogenicness, ye curse moste horrible.
I don’t know. I can’t remember her name. I think it was Pumpkin, maybe. She was adopted a while back.
*That line is Galadriel’s, which is also why it’s the best line in this AMAZING poem.