Episode Three: Oathbreaker

Uggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghghghghghhhhghghghg.

sansaspoilers

The stand out is that one thing that happened which we feared would happen, and will be its own post. In short, it was our nightmare come true. Damn it show, we were starting to like you.

But apart from that this was a pretty packed episode with lots to talk about. Dany at the Dosh Khaleen left a bit to be desired – Dany’s still posturing and she does need to get over herself a little bit, but the Dosh Khaleen need to get over themselves too. We were hoping that hanging around kickass older women who have similar (though… obviously not the same) life experiences as Dany would be really powerful and Dany would learn a lot and it would be excellent… and we’re sure it will be. In the books. But so far for the show, this episode seems to imply that it’ll be kind of meh. We’ll wait and see.

Tyrion/Missandei/Grey Worm was an interesting scene, but it would have been better if they’d played Tyrion’s game after all, even without the liquor. He could stand to hear from some life experiences that differ some from his own, and though that was happening here he seemed to be sort of mocking them. Thank the Seven Missandai stood up and started calling for blood, that was awesome. Here’s hoping these three develop their relationship even though Tyrion has nothing in common with them. We look forward to more.

Varys got a little scene with the sex worker from last season who murdered an Unsullied who was paying for the girlfriend experience. It’s nice that this character got a name, and a story, and some sympathy, because the handling of this whole situation was vicious last season. It was nice to see Varys doing some work – some actual work. Usually these scenes cut out after he and whoever he’s whisper-voicing at vaguely discuss some plot relevant subject and imply that something ought to be done.

Qyburn with Varys’s little birds? Not good.

Olenna in the same room as Ser Zombie-Mountain? Not good.

Everyone else in the same room as Ser Zombie-Mountain? We’re not fussed. But we don’t really want to watch him kill Pycelle. Pycelle is awful but it’d be better if he just tripped down some stairs or something.

Edd has the wall! Good.

Did Jon just leave without Ghost, or are we to assume he’s stomping off to pack his things?

Sansa arriving at Castle Black and missing Jon but gaining Davos? Look. She should gain Davos, that would be awesome BUT SHE CAN’T MISS JON COME OOOOOOOOOOOON NOT AFTER WHAT YOU JUST DID TO US STARK-WISE. SHOW YOU ARE CRUEL.

Sam and Gilly = wake us up when they get somewhere and do something.

Tommen and the High Sparrow was an intriguing scene. Are we about to witness a season’s worth of Cersei/High Sparrow angeling and deviling on Tommen’s little shoulders?

Arya! We aren’t committed to her wanting to murder the Waif. That’s stupid. But the blunt exposition about her conflicted feelings about the Hound were nice. And blunt. The drink was a test, too, right, and not actually a very specific type of poison? We have never been convinced that Arya is capable of being no one. We probably never will be. She’s coming back. We need her to avenge Shaggy too now.

Tower of Joy almost happened but what is far more interesting is that ONE MOMENT…. Can Bran commune with the past? Will he have to make the moral decision not to? It certainly seems that way, based on how ol’ Three-Eye reacted.

Traitors got hanged. Jon storms off. Jon. Storm yourself all the way south to Winterfell and GET THAT GUY. GET HIM RIGHT NOW. AND THOSE JOKE UMBERS.

Next episode has Jorah and Daario trying to be heros but no one cares because DAMN IT SMALLJON.

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