The team at HBO thought we could all use another couple of lessons in how not to write a show.
Lesson 1: when writing men who’ve had their penises removed, it’s cool to add a scene set in a topless bar and point out over and over again that the man in question doesn’t have a penis and therefore has no interest in sexual things and if he did, tough luck.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha it’s so funny you got your genitals mutilated ha ha ha ha ha cough cough gag choke cough hack choke gag gag hack choke
We’re starting to regret requesting no creepy sex scenes for Missandei and Grey Worm, because it’s becoming clear that this show thinks men sans pinot are sexless desireless people. If Theon wanted to participate he could have. And as for his own sexual gratification? In an effort to one-up this and other episodes that joke about this stuff erm went looking to see if men sans penises can experience sexual gratification and you know what? She found nothing of much use. But whatever. He still has a prostate gland, right? And testicles, as far as we know. And even the neuteredest cats and dogs do weird sex things so shut up, Game of Thrones. Stop making fun of this sort of thing, it’s unseemly and awful and just. Stop. Now.
Also don’t feature a bunch of women, playing sex workers no less, just for their nude bodies. Give them AT LEAST ONE LINE OMG
Lesson 2: always, always, without fail, write god awful religious fanaticism stuff. Just plaster the show with mindless nonsense about spite-killing of peaceful people with nothing because they worship seven different gods.
You’d think they knew this stuff, what with having to make the High Sparrow a more nuanced villain than, say, Ramsay. But no, apparently not.
Seven save us. R’hollr, give us light. Not today. Etc.
But Lady Mormont is the best and that sort of makes up for it. Sort of.